vintage

Look they've rolled out the lumpy white carpet

Definitely Marriage Material

Mommy, I'm tired of drinking milk all the time. I want a tall glass of single-malt scotch too!
Soon enough, dear!

Get her higher, quickly! The lightning storm's approaching!

Another bad example of women drivers

It's gotten so much harder to stand up since I switched to Long Island Iced Tea.

Now about that bed time ....

Tonight, you become a woman. When it happens, just lie back, close your eyes and think about shoe shopping.

Giant Bubble Wands Don't know why they never caught on.

It's all about location, but I say f**k it... we can just do it like animals on this slab behind me.

YOU USED MY MR. BUBBLES. WITHOUT PERMISSION.

ONE RINGY DINGY, TWO RINGY DINGY

We missed you. You're the life of the party.

The word of the day is abstinence.

i'm feeling a bit moonstruck tonight

The disappearing underwear trick. Always a crowd-pleaser for Houdini.