Nothing sells a house like a kid stripping in the middle of a mess.

Don't worry, they've subtracted the burned portion from the listed square footage. It's like it doesn't even exist!

Think of all the parties you could throw under this baby? And all the rides you could hitch!

That dog's bed is nicer than my whole house. Can I come crash at your place, Fido?

Who needs furniture on the floor, cluttering up the room when you can hang it from the walls and hang other stuff from it!

Someday my dreams will come true and I'll live in a terrifying haunted house.

Vacations are an exercise in cognitive behavioral therapy. Summers are really a time for growth.

It's nice of the architects to offer you a quick exit I guess.

T.J. Eckleburg gets sneaky.

This is what happens to Transformers after they retire. They are relegated to being vaguely useful in favorable weather.

When you find a lot of three tons of tile on clearance you find a way to make it worth the investment.

I bet Barry had a seriously great time in his time here.

Don't you hate how there always seems to be someone around when you trip and fall on your face?

This is a far cry from the mountain vacation rentals of my youth. But where's the hot tub?

Remarkably lifelike! And it does so well with the brick!

Crushed velvet is the eternal symbol of opulence. For vampires.