Oh thank god, I have twelve hundred dollars burning a hole in my pocket and my toilet is SO BORING.

Imagine what could happen if bees took up carpentry. They'd make the most awesome furniture!

I've seen some oddly-appropriated studio apartments, but this is taking spare living to a new level.

If a woodchuck could lay hardwood?

This was one church. Now it's four apartments. No numbers, no letters, they're named Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John!

Feel free to buy the house, but you may still find me here from time to time, just being alone and minding my own.

There's a struggle here between getting lost in a book and getting lost in the view. I suppose it's a win either way.

What are you setting me up for, Chair?

When your baseboards start to look like they're having a costume party you've got a problem on your hands.

This is like a set from some Technicolor movie in the late '50s. That lamp! Those curtains! When can I move in?

You know your food is bad when the table gets up from itself and walks away.

Surround it with the gaudiest tiles known to humankind. That should distract from the beauty of the ocean.

I love geraniums as much as the next girl, but this time commitment is just too much.

What is it about vintage fixtures that makes them attract so much extra dust? This place looks filthy.