Your Pocket Change is Mine, All Mine!

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Your Pocket Change is Mine, All Mine!
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Also great if you want your ass to look like a Belgian waffle.

Why is This Kindling Bundled So Securely?

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Why is This Kindling Bundled So Securely?
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I'll just throw it all on the fire, that should get things going.

Floral + Nautical = Flautical?

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Floral + Nautical = Flautical?
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"Captain! We're capsized! I've lashed myself to the wheel but it's pointing straight up at the sky! I don't know if we'll get out of this pink floral sea alive!"

(Thanks to our submitter for the awesome title and commentary. You guys make my job so easy!)

Desonstructed Fire

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Desonstructed Fire
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I say burn the end table first, then start on the wood in the rack.

Stormtrooper Patio Chair

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Stormtrooper Patio Chair
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Who needs a boring ol' Adirondak chair in the yard when you could combine forces with an ineffectual sentry!

Why So Stumpy, Stumpy?

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Why So Stumpy, Stumpy?
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It's like someone left a solitary marshmallow to rot in the woods and some industrious fungus Smurfs moved in.