Why can't you just read Harry Potter or The Hunger Games like all the other kids?

At leest he will grow up preparred.

No. I have not seen the mailman.

Iss juss fluff. Nawt fat. Don't wurry about dat.

Did yoo lerns to dribe in a country wher dey duzzent hab STOP SIGNS?

Dis is mai purrsonal hell.

In da near foochur you needz to buyz bigga paw warmer thingee. Dis one iz gettin too thmall.

Becuz rite nao ai do nawt fitz.

You said,"Cheese." Where's the Cheese?

Please to nawt hab nasty slices, tho.

There was a 50/50 chance that Nipper's body would reject the leg graft. We're all rootin' for him.

Da good news is dat its onlee slightly notisable...

YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT

Ssssssssooooooooo... a murrmaid??