the most interesting man in the world

I DON'T ALWASYS DRINK DOS EQUIS, BUT WHEN I DO, I GET SUED BY ITS AD AGENCY.

I DON'T ALWAYS EAT COOKIES BUT WHEN I DO, I EAT THEM IN A HORRIFYINGLY VIOLENT MANNER

(Cookie Monster)

I don't always hump strangers. But when I do, I make sure it's your boss' wife.

I don't always raid your wine cabinet. But when I do, I make sure to leave you the cheap stuff.

I don't always walk around the house naked, Oh wait, Yes I do.

I don't always lie on the footpath But when I do, I cause as much disruption to your free passage as possible

I don't always "Phone Home" But when I do, I'm Drunk.

I don't always click links, but when I do... LOLZ!

I don't always steal fur coats, but, when I do I steal fake fur. The Least Interesting Man in the World

(Randy Quaid)

I won't always shed on your black skirt. But when I do, I... Oh, wait... yes I will.

I don't always drink beer But when I do, it will be yours

I dont always Sniff you Crotch, but when I do, Its in Public