GUESS WHAT AMERICA
I LEARNED HOW TO READ
Now how long do I cook this thing?
just cup them like this
(Rick Perry, Ron Paul)
Breaking News - As you can see I live and eat in New Jersey.
And my husband is the Queen of Denial.
Congratulations, Mrs. Dorfmann, here's your Publisher's Clearinghouse grand prize. We ran out of money, so we're giving away one million babies. The rest are in the truck.
This reminds me of something little baby Jesus once told me. "It's not a sin, if it's on a stick."
And the winner of the "George W. Bush Impersonation Award" goes to ... Rick Perry
(Mitt Romney, Rick Perry)
YOU MEAN I HAVE TO DO THIS... OBAMASELF?
OBAMA'S POLICIES DESTROYED THE ECONOMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO, YOU ARE REMEMBERING IT WRONG.
(Republican debates, Steve Carell)
Yay! We're killing trees! Less paper for books. Means less libraries! Yay!
"And if he calls you a goose, then you have to chase him around the circle and catch him before he makes it back around and takes your place in the circle."
I blame it on the hipsters.
And you caution us about the live camera?