Sing me into a deep, soft, carb-loaded sleep with your sweet song and soothing march.
I never have the energy to let my fish, gravy and peas set into the desired shape. I always skip the molding step and head straight to eating, silly me.
Someday someone will recognize me in a drive through for being that one lady who writes crappy jokes about food on the internet. A girl can dream...
That fancy mud bath spa you love? Yeah, that's stew for giants.
This is not what I had in mind when I ordered dessert pizza. Where's my giant cookie?
Flood the elevators with honey mustard sauce and only offer to pay to clean people's shoes if they eat a 20 piece. Sweet deal.
Can I get an order of two shoulders up and an extra scoop of whatever chicken stuff?
No Matter Who You Are, You've Always Got to Start With a ...
The First Official Trailer for ‘Jurassic World’ is Here, ...
How to Obtain Happiness
Pancake, Do a Barrel Roll!
Oh How the Tables Have Turned, Human
This Conversation Between a 13-Year-Old Coming Out to His ...
Buddy, We've Got Bad News for You
How to Make Every Programmer Your Sworn Enemy
Link is So Happy in His Kart
Celebrities Read Mean Tweets of the Day
Pick Your Site Name
Tell me more