Sing me into a deep, soft, carb-loaded sleep with your sweet song and soothing march.
I never have the energy to let my fish, gravy and peas set into the desired shape. I always skip the molding step and head straight to eating, silly me.
Someday someone will recognize me in a drive through for being that one lady who writes crappy jokes about food on the internet. A girl can dream...
That fancy mud bath spa you love? Yeah, that's stew for giants.
This is not what I had in mind when I ordered dessert pizza. Where's my giant cookie?
Flood the elevators with honey mustard sauce and only offer to pay to clean people's shoes if they eat a 20 piece. Sweet deal.
Can I get an order of two shoulders up and an extra scoop of whatever chicken stuff?
The 16 Best Thrones Made Out of Anything But Iron
Man Argues With Husky, Husky Pretty Much Wins
Best of Tinder: Week 3/22-3/28
The 10 Commandments of RPGs
¿Qué estás viendo?
This Seethingly Homophobic Congressman From Idaho Forgot ...
Practicing With Live Grenades Goes Wrong in the Chinese Army
Hacking Your Eyes to Give Yourself Night Vision
Ya estás grande
Pick Your Site Name
Tell me more