Nope, I don't think I'll be keeping my books that close to a bidet. Ever. Nope.

It's like the Winchester Mystery House on a budget!

I guess if you've got low standards and are just looking for someone generic to share your bed, that's your prerogative.

You said you want a chair your kid can't rock back onto two legs, you never said you wanted it to be attractive.

This is a late night, mid-'90s disaster!

If the IRS wants to send me anything, they know where they can stick it.

I ask you, do the books convey? Subtle.