pilots
By Unknown
We are currently cruising at 35,000 feet Would all dogs proceed to the nearest exit. Thank you.
Under our new seating policies, first class passengers will be entitled to boxes lined with fleece blankies.
Good Morning Passengers At this time we offer early boarding for Business Cat Class
Please help yourself to our complimentary snack sized bags of kibbles. Our galley kitchen is not equipped to store carry-on fresh prey.
May I have your attention... I have been informed by the TSA that someone is smuggling nip on this flight. It is a crime not to share.
My apologies for flying in circles. The copilot is a dog and he's trying to catch the tail assembly.
In the unlikely event of a water landing Someone please save me! I can't swim.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE'VE REACHED OUR CRUSING ALTITUDE FEEL FREE TO TURN ON YOUR ELECTRONIC CAN OPENERS
In the event of an emergency, shiny dangly things will drop down from the overhead compartment to distract you.
We will now begin our descent by circling the runway 30 times and then land where it is least convenient for the airport.
Ladies and Gentlemen: If you look off to your left you will see A BIRD! A BIRD! OMG, IT'S A BIRD!
Ladies and Gentlemen: Please ignore the hissing coming over the loudspeaker, the captain in the next plane over is looking at me.
PLEASE FASTEN YOUR SEAT BELTS THAT CLOUD LOOKS LIKE A BALL OF YARN
Via Reddit
PLEASE TURN OFF ALL ELECTRONIC DEVICES, AS THEY MAY INTERFERE WITH NAVIGATION EQUIPMENT. AND NO LASER POINTERS. THEY FREAK ME THE ** OUT.
Love LOLcats? Who doesn't?! There are so many more over here!
