explanation

My parents did it on a Monopoly board. So I was born with a top hat.

bettur dan bein a thimblol, aifinkso.

Hey now, who are you calling a sissy!? I'll have you know that this is in fact a medicine ball, and my struggle to push it up this hill stems not from a crippling lack of coordination on my part but rather from the fact that it weighs roughly twice what I do! Strong-man elephant is more like it, thankyouverymuch!

Listen, I could really use some help here, and I don't have time to offer you a lengthy explanation given my current state of being, but to synopsize for you, let's just say it involved a dare with the other ladies, three cans of fava beans and a hot-wired forklift. That's all you're gonna get out of me about it until you get me down, okay?

You have to understand though; it was nothing special. It was just that I was trying to take a nap on his foot (which looks an awful lot like a pillow if you kind of squint at it a bit), and he kept doing this annoying "fee fi fo fum" thing, and it kept waking me up and so I felt like the only way to solve the problem at hand was to take matters into my own paws. He was asking for it, really.

Mrrr, what? Oh, um, no, I wasn't sleeping! No, I was just... I was just trying to find a sense of "oneness" with this keyboard, because that's always what I do whenever I begin work on a new composition! Genius CAN come overnight, you know... it just usually involves a bit of sleeping and dreaming.

See, there's your problem right there.You admit you only wanna capturethe "horseys." They're called "knights" by the way. Have you tried to find a game better-suited for you? I bet you'd love "Fish."

itz a pwetty borin gaym anywayz.

BECAUSE I CAN

Explanation U better have a good one.

What? Iz busy becomin' an antique

Can't heer yur rules Earz too small

ul nevr gess wut hapnd

it follow me home..... dat makes it mine awl mine