We'll take a baker's dozen, paw-lease!

Anything humans can do, cats can do better.

The feline is crying literal tears, but refuses to leave his hooman behind!

“The first thing we are NOT going to do, is we are NOT going to climb the tree. No, it is not for climbing. It is for looking at, okay?”

You can meow right off, thank you.

There should be an Oscar ceremony for most dramatic house cat.

“I know you just want to feel free, but there are things outside that will hurt you. Okay, this is your safe zone. You're an indoor kitty and you just don't know how good you have it… She's sad.”

First you gently pet, then you panic and violently pet, then you get a very annoyed old cat...

Try the technique and see if you leave with a happy kitty or injured hand!