captioned

ummm i r king kong?

but u doan luk liek a munkee...

IM WATCHIN U SLEEP

at leest itz meh watchin an nawt mai shadow...

AS GOD IS MY WITNESS YOU'LL HAS THAT CHEEZBURGER

Duz ai has 2 wayt until Septembur 18?

AND IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOUUUUUU

We miss u, Whitney!

She made two critical mistakes: 1. She bought me cheap store brand cat food 2. She forgot to log out of her facebook account

hab fun nawt habin anee frenz!

Dandy on my father's side... Lion on my mother's.

an ai gotz teh grumpees frum boaf parintz!

Used ta bee ALLIGAYTORS comin up frum draynes. Dis iz BIG IMPROOVMINT .

u can say dat agin!

im scuurd guys

plz 2 protektz meh?

Firefox 8 Still in it's infancy.

ai hoap ai can stil open multiplol tabz!

O kai. Ai stopt. Ai smeltid em. Now wuts?

iz dis teh part wer ai eetz dem?

Yur boss came in an gave me a look but I kept my hed down an kept workin. I finished da Benson account, gotted it approved, rote da specs for da new software yu need, got it approved, talked da Fridgit Company into buyin 350 ov owr new product an fnished up that paper yu were writing for da Grabble proposal. Den I went to lunch.

business cat finkz u deserve a raise!

Help Me! Stranger Danger!

yooz ur claws fer sayftee, kitteh!

See no ebil... Heer no ebil... Iz keepin mah opshuns opan.

basement kitteh approovs of ur openniss 2 ebil.

Ah...I think this is the part where I'm suppose to run in fear

doan jus stand der! run!!

AI DEMAND MAH WUN FONE CAWL!

iz u gunna call dog?

Okay, then...on second thought, I'll go quietly into the bathtub.

mebbe it woan b so bad aftur all...