Sorry, goggies of the world, but your shake-to-dry methods have ultimately been outclassed by those of the elephant.
I mean, sure, that's a great story and whatever, and the rhyme scheme is pretty fabulous as well... but COME ON! There's no way that vulpine character is even half as chic as me! I rock socks like Beyoncé rocks heels! ... and also my feet get cold at night sometimes and so they are nice because they help me keep warm. But also they are stylish just like me and that's really why I wear them!