Now hold on tight to mama's fluffy tail widdle cub, so you two don't get separated.
Howard won't let go of my tail until I admit that I like Justin Bieber. But I DON'T like Justin Bieber! Moooom! Make him stoooop!
... well, I suppose that's one way to convey words of wisdom to your child. Perhaps not the most lovingly parental way, but almost doubtlessly an effective one.