Someday you'll master the croissant. Don't let that awful lady next door discourage you.

Install this in my house immediately! I don't care if it takes up my entire kitchen, I must have it!

I know it's tough now that you're tiny, but can you still make me dinner? I'm so tired!

InB4: Woman, get back in the kitchen!

Lessons this kid needs to learn: 1. Meat forks are not for spaghetti 2. Meatballs are not meant to be the size of your face 3. Wipe that grin off your face 4. Get a decent haircut

My drawers are looking so empty, can I get some more bulky, single-use utensils?

Well that's one way to get me to stop eating hot dogs.