You are the Worst Kind of Human

Favorite
i hate you,jerk,middle,pizza,slice,wtf
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Okay I get it, you don't like crust! You're never eating pizza with me again.

Pint Lock is a Jerk

Favorite
ben-and-jerrys,ice cream,jerk,lock,mean
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Let me in dammit! When I need ice cream I need it NOW!

Shut Up. Pie

Favorite
crust,humble,jerk,pie,word
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Don't be such a martyr. Are you going to insist on doing the dishes while we all eat you too? Ugh.

Jerk Onion

Favorite
cross section,cry,face,jerk,onion,smile
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Look at that sadistic grin as he watches me cry. I hate that guy.

Scumbag DNA

Favorite
DNA,jerk,meme,scumbag,Tastebuds
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Why can't carrots and quinoa be the most delicious thing on the planet? My waistline hates you, DNA.

Oh Ho Ho Aren't You Clever?

Favorite
jerk,portable woman,sandwich maker,sexist
- -

Just wait until a real woman comes along and slams your hand in the thing. I doubt she'll stick around to nurse you back to health, you big baby.

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