It's wise to be topless when eating a Carl's Jr. burger just in case.

There is no way this is real. I DEMAND A RECOUNT.

You aren't even a citrus, that coat looks dumb on you.

Oh how I wish Pringles would go high-brow. I could really go for some compressed asiago artichoke potato crisps.

Can you rap these leftovers for me? No I don't want a bag, drop a beat!

Yes, these are fake, but I bet you could slap this on a box of regular old Lucky Charms and sell them to rich people for $20 a box. Let's start a business!

You wanna nitpick some politics? Get cooking in the Pundit Kitchen!