Admit it, you just want to see the fear in the eyes of your food as you devour it.

I feel like if you're driving a Land Rover you're gonna be able to get to help. But it's always good to have a dry, papery snack.

Somebody needs to put a baby on this cake and pretend to adjust his spine.

Every page of this cookbook is a big ol' lasagna noodle that you cook into dinner when you're done reading it. Delicious genius!

They taste like crap, but making these little Happy Kitchen kits is one of life's greatest pleasures!

How can I get a hot chick interested in me who likes the same things I do? Make her jewelry out of disgusting bacon flavored candy! I can't lose!

The award for coolest Chinese dumpling shaped like a dragon goes to this badass.