No Diving

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No Diving
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By Unknown
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I told you it was too shallow!

I Hate Going to the Jones' parties

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I Hate Going to the Jones' parties
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Picking all that sparkly asbestos ceiling out of my socks is such a pain.

Take a Nap While Your Housecar Parks Itself

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Take a Nap While Your Housecar Parks Itself
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And then it was like I was back in high school but it wasn't like really MY high school, it was just like the idea of it? And then I was in this room, but it was a car, but it was driving itself? And then you were there, but you had different hair and you were making out with Margaret and that was like, totally bizarre.

Wait, How? What?

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Wait, How? What?
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Two car garage; you're doing it wrong.

Anything for Furniture

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Anything for Furniture
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I was tired of the Ferarri and knew it would look just great in here. Don't worry, the Maserati is still intact, though it would look great over the infinity pool.