We know that you play video games on the toilet already anyway.

Want to be surrounded by your favorite books?

Never have I wished to be a little girl again like I do now.

This is going to be a stretch but there used to be this hardcore band called Botch who I saw once in probably 1998 where there were multi-directional lights coming out from under the drummer's platform just like this! The rest of the band faced him while they played and it was like they were worshiping at the altar of the kick drum.

What I'm getting at is, instead of an alarm clock, I want a late '90s hardcore moshpit in my bedroom and I'll never be late to work again.

A love song for my bookcase: "You... lime up my li-i-ife....."

Just think of all the possibilities! And the possibility of inhaling fiberglass insulation shards!

It's a duel to the mortgage!