have u tried rollin' round in it?

but how will ai find mai purfet match???

Umm... I think your eHarmony profile said you were taller, and a dog.

but sumtiemz honestee isnt bestest polisee...

psst...wen da hoomins say dare goin' to wurk, day really goes to da dog park.........wif out u.

y do kittehz hab to b so meeen?

So, he called you a "bad boy" for something the feline did? We'll sue for defamation!

u gotta kall corgi c. corgster!

They say the dog is man's best friend. I don't believe that... How many of your friends have you neutered?

lemme return teh favor!

Aliens?

do u rly beweve in alienz?