You can't fool me, impostor!

See now, if this had been Pepsi products we wouldn't be in this mess!

But how do they keep a carbonated beverage from bursting the seams?

There's no such thing as free love, buddy. That chick will promote tooth decay!

Taking food that is already cooked and ready to eat and just sogging it up real good in a rice cooker is not cooking. Also now you have nasty Coke-flavored rice.

I know you get excited but I feel like you're just faking it.

I love you, caffeine addiction. Be mine for always.