Might as well smear it all over my face. It DOES say face cream after all.

A lack of self respect isn't worth a little bucket of gummy bears and fruity pebbles.

Would there be three whole tear-jerking stories about toys without free cereal? The world may never know.

Hope you don't have any place to be later!

The night farts after eating this bad boy will be worse than Kanye's ego on the Concorde!

I'll take my chances with number two there, sailor.

Get a life! Hell, get four!