gopher

'Scuse me. Pardon me. Hey, buddy. Can ya hear me? Dude, seriously. I'm tryin' to help ya. Okay, fine! HEY DUMB AZZ! YOUR LENS CAP IS STILL ON!

Thank you for calling AT&T All our operators are currently playing Pinochle. You have been placed in a queue...

Sometimes what we are looking for is nearer than we think.

I have no idea what I'm doing!

f-stop 16? Good, good depth of field... Shutter speed 1/15 sec? No, no! You'll get camera-shake!

Hey, you kids! Get outta my yard!

Excuse me sir, but you need to aim the camera at me!

Hey Harold! Barrrruuuuuugggguurp! Top that one, creampuff!!!

Fank U, but I'ze doan needz anymor gurl skowt kookeez, I'ze alreddy gibbd to mah faborit chariteez, I alweddy herd abowt teh wurd ob Dog, an I no voetz fur ur kandydaet. Wat part ob 'No Solizutting' u no unnerstanz? Nao, pweez GO AWAY!

I recommend.. you gopher the subterranean time-share. It's dirt cheap at the moment.

Okay sir, again, have you tried turning the device "on?"

Where in hell did he go? Over here, pall. And I don't pose for free you know!

DAMN HUMANS! Always tearing up my yard! The traps don't even appear to be working very well.

Okay, so I'm not two mountain sheep running their heads together, but I deserve my fifteen minutes of fame too!