celeb

New This Xmas: 42nd Street Barbie

(Cameron Diaz)

Don't tell anyone but I just peed in the pool

(James Cameron, Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet)

I will be back... me and my floating head

(Arnold Schwarzenegger)

Skittley Doo!

(Bette Midler)

I'm reading a very interesting book. But I can't read. Take that English.

(Val Kilmer)

Joan Rivers will show up anywhere and accost celebrities.

(Prince Charles, Camilla, Joan Rivers)

Breaking News - And if you buy now, ELITE will provide complementary ass-beatings for the first 50 people who cut you off in traffic!!!

(Grace Jones)

Get in loser we're going shopping.

(Britney Spears)

Stop staring at my girlfriend!

(Mel Gibson)

HI, MY NAME IS NICK. RIGHT NOW I'LL DO ANYTHING FOR MONEY. CHEESY MOVIE? COUNT ME IN. PR0NO? BEEN THERE, DONE THAT. COMMERCIALS FOR ORTHOPEDIC UNDERPANTS? HECK, I'M WEARING SOME RIGHT NOW.

(Nicolas Cage)

One sides tingling, but the other just feels like there's foam on it.

(Woody Harrelson)

WHAT UP!? B*TCHES!

(Oprah Winfrey)

Sometimes, when I get nervous, I put my hands in my armpits like this...

(Madonna)

DAVID BOWIE'S DANCING WITH A FAN Your argument is inv.. well, I guess that's pretty normal for him

(David Bowie)

They told me I could be anything I wanted... ...apparently I don't want much...

(Nicolas Cage)

OWN ALL THE MEDIA!

(Oprah Winfrey)