thats-a-bummer-man

Watch your step, boy, or I'll scratch you so hard, you'll be howlin' for a week! You realize you've been declawed, right?

u r such a nawty kitteh!

I THOUGHT YOU WERE NEVER EVER EVER EVER COMING HOME EVER SO I PANICKED

Don't worry.. yu dint hurt mah ball wen yu stepped on it. Ai guess onlee kittehs land on der paws. Hoomins land on der butts.

doez u need sum assistance??

You fell down. Would slobbering on you help?

yep, ai fink dat will doo da twick!

Cant fink uv gud capshunz. Guess Ai iz in a LUL.

yah, dat iz nawt funneh.

i got this! oh yes! wait no! oh snap!

u r rilly running frum sumfing aren't u?

I FEEL YOUR PAIN. OR I DID. WHEN I BIT YA.

gotta watch owt 4 da wittle wuns!

ugh, theres nothin on t.v today

it wuz werking just fine yesturday!

Did ai do bad? Wuz ai nawt sposed ta hump ur muvver in lawz leg?

mebbe u shod taek it slowur nekst tiem?

Shood... Shood I get sumone?

ouch, ouch and more ouch!