i haz a ouch caz u kiss it?

ai heerz u can fix owchez wif cowchez.

I can has birth control?

aifinkso itz calld bein cranky.

Ya wanna unhitch me or do you want to take me AND the carpet for a walk?

leeshez r ment fer goggiez, nawt meh!

THELMA? LOUISE? HELLO? YOU DOWN THERE??

aifinkso dey mite ob had an askident...

I CAN SETTLE ON CAT-AN?

dis waaaaaay bettur den monopolee!

STOP! why? um...hammer time?

it mite b moar convinsin if u had teh sillee pantz.

Do I look like Gene Simmons?

teh resemblinse iz uncannee!