In the unlikely event of a water landing Someone please save me! I can't swim.
We will now begin our descent by circling the runway 30 times and then land where it is least convenient for the airport.
Ladies and Gentlemen: If you look off to your left you will see A BIRD! A BIRD! OMG, IT'S A BIRD!
PLEASE FASTEN YOUR SEAT BELTS THAT CLOUD LOOKS LIKE A BALL OF YARN