This Is Warmer Then Teh Laptop

itz alsew warmer den ur mudder-in-law.

Hmm...you smell suspiciously like a sweater...

plz 2 nawt mayk meh wayr u...

maybe I seez wy yumanz likes dis

plz 2 tayk frum bebbeh an gibz 2 meh?

LIKE A PAWS

Over-eating can lead to serious health problems ... Like sudden and inexplicable blindness

DAT LUKS LIKE MINE

Nao nao don't worry, I'll save yo some.... I don't reely care for da neck anywayz.