Pick your jaw up off the floor and let's go to Portland!
Cutting down on portion sizes: You're doing it right. And adorably.
"Eight chips. That's all you get, fatty." -the most judgmental bag of chips ever.
If you can see through it, there are no real calories, right?
Does anyone have that drummer's contact info? He's got promise!
I don't remember a mountain of ice cream in Wonka's factory but I'm sure there was one in there somewhere.
I like you, chips. You can come home with me.