How to turn off your carnival date: eat a super suggestive sentient corndog.

Such a salty affair!

Watch out you don't accidentally deep fry your clock there, Flav!

Why the Chinese need Obama to sell them a KFC fish sandwich is beyond me. Hey, whatever clogs your arteries!

Funny Food Photos - Amazing Butter Commercial

Stupid pizza, toppings don't love you, you're basically just a mode of transportation for them.

Remember when Jason Alexander had hair? Remember when we wanted twice the planet-killing packaging with our fast food? Remember when everyone wore primary colors and rolled up their jacket sleeves? Those were the days.