When I was little I felt like everyone in the world had a perfect princess double-decker playhouse except me. Of course I'd never seen one in real life but I just KNEW that I was the only little girl who only had a woodshed and a plastic lawnmower to play with.

Too little, too late!

Take a squat on the gravel around the ol blue hole. My summer parties are going to be the best!

Ted

Mommy! Bring me my rum! And help me swab my poop deck!

I'm sorry. That was terrible. But you're gonna have to live with it.

They won't let him in the house because he can't fit through the door. Slim down, Chair!

My dog learned to read and has been trying to poop in that yard for weeks. This explains his love for my old KISS records.

Just pee in the woods! Perfect new home!