J. K. Rowling is buying these for her kids. For the yard. To play in. Does she perhaps need a live-in au pair?

Come on kids, let's keep moving. I don't think they have the kind of candy we want.

I recommend buying your overzealous neighbors fire extinguishers as Halloween gifts. That's a thing, right?

Mommy! Bring me my rum! And help me swab my poop deck!

I'm sorry. That was terrible. But you're gonna have to live with it.

When I was little I felt like everyone in the world had a perfect princess double-decker playhouse except me. Of course I'd never seen one in real life but I just KNEW that I was the only little girl who only had a woodshed and a plastic lawnmower to play with.

Dooooooom! DOOOOOOOOOOOOM! Really, just remember to bring in your garbage cans, k?

In order to join the fraternal brotherhood, pledging chairs have to spend an entire night pretending to be patio furniture in the suburbs and not die of boredom. Few survive.