It's so reflective, you could get a suntan indoors!
The silhouettes of old dead people aren't creepy enough, can you make them look like they're coming after me?
Yes, but with a touch of wet dog.
I'm pretty sure someone has been smoking in bed here for the past 80 years. koff koff
Maybe if I throw as many colors and patterns as I can at this place, no one will notice how boring it is! Ugly can't be boring, right?
You can travel the world from the privacy of your own personal throne.
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