Hey, we spent $5.5 million on the place. We're not gonna let a little water damage get us down.

How dreary and drab must this photo have been for such drastic measures to be necessary?

Oh my god, with a bathroom like this I wouldn't need the rest of the house. Just install a pneumatic tube to deliver me food and I'm a happy camper!

Sure, I'd love to knowingly trap myself in a plastic bubble full of many many gallons of water within which I could easily slip and drown. Oh it has a safety latch inside? So I can also destroy my floor in the process? I'll take three!

WAKE UP AND ENJOY YOUR SUNNY, CHEERFUL, POSITIVE, GO-GET-EM LIFE THERE COWBOY!!!

These people clearly know how to have a good time. I'm moving in.

I'll put my bed on the second island and the couch and shelves in the fireplace alcove. Perfect apartment!