I'd turn into the pruniest prune who ever pruned if I ever spent any time here because I would never ever get out of the tub!

Go on through, enjoy the bureaucratic nightmare that is the afterlife.

But Moooooom! I like having my hair over my eyes!

Ahhhh, how soothing. Spines facing out, not organized by color, not stacked in a fireplace. Now if only there were comfortable and visible furniture to sit on and read.

This is the interior decorating version of lipstick on a pig.

Well aren't you SOOOO important, Mr. House Over the Water?

I know, I know: BROKEN SPINES! THE HORROR! But you guys! Look how pretty! Calm your corsets, whif your smelling salts. It's gonna be okay. Look, ooooh, globe!