Due to a wine stain on the original papyrus manuscript, "leading the Rapture" was translated as "riding the raptor."
WTF Jesus! Look at this mess!!! Clean your room now!
Come on, Dad, if I'm old enough to rise from the dead, I'm old enough to borrow the car.
Quiet, I'm trying to watch the news.
SEVEN PUNDS OF PURE JESUS DUDE!!
THEN JESUS SAID THIS PARTY BLOWS, LET THERE BE WINE
My friends my friends, do not be alarmed, i am jesus penguin. its what i do.
And thou shall honor Topless Tuesday. Trust me, it's in there!