Do we hav enuff tickets? Can I hav sum popcorm I can has baffroom? Can I get a tishoo? If I stick up a foot will sumwun gib us a ride? Will my seat be fluffy? Ar we there yet?

Damn. Here comes that kid with his lollipop questions.

"U an mom been happily marrid for 23 yeers?" "Dat mite be stretchin teh truth."

Have you ever wondered about teh furst person who watched a chicken poop an egg... and think "I will eat that."