Step 1 to Cooking: Remove cat from pan.
Now, it's very important that you get the filets onto the stove while the bastard's still screaming. It's not effective revenge if he can't hear himself sizzling.
No wait, you read the recipe wrong. It said "honey"
You're sure I need the butter for the sauna?
And why did not you want me to eat the thyme and the spring onions?
Always put on extra frosting so no one will taste the Hashish.
Barefoot and Pregnant he says.. WELL! Let's see if he can taste the Poison..